#229 - Why Not You: Stop Looking for Reasons It Is Not for You

There are moments where you start questioning if something is really meant for you.

You look at the requirements. You compare yourself to others. You start listing all the reasons why it might not work.

And before you even try you have already taken yourself out of the running.

Salisha is getting into that today.

In this episode, you'll hear about:

• The Black women on Broadway who have expanded what feels possible
• Why representation matters more than we sometimes give it credit for
• What happens when you watch someone take on a role that was never written for them and absolutely own it
• The difference between bold confidence and overthinking yourself out of opportunities
• What being married to the most go for it person she knows taught her about herself
• The mindset shift behind asking why not me

You do not need more proof. You do not need more permission. You just need to decide to go for it.

CHAPTERS

• [01:08] Being inspired by Black women on Broadway
• [02:09] The moment that shifted her perspective on what comes next
• [03:44] Why representation is not just a talking point it is a portal
• [04:59] Performers who redefined what roles can look like
• [06:17] Watching someone step into a role and make it their own
• [08:15] The habit of disqualifying yourself before you even start
• [08:56] The difference between bold confidence and hesitation
• [09:38] Why the world rewards people who just go for it
• [10:34] Why not you though. Seriously. Why not you.

THE GLOW UP SOCIETY https://www.skool.com/be-a-10-6090/about?ref=c422989aa4694d43b0b708ca534c4582

@salishathomas @thesalishashow, www.thesalishashow.com

Many thanks to Gotham Network in NYC, TyNia Brandon for writing and laying vocals down for the updated theme song and Big Red Studios for the intro video wherever you watch the latest season of The Salisha Show!

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:21

Hello and welcome. Welcome back to the Silicia Show. I'm your host, Salisha Thomas, and I am, oh my god, you guys, I'm exhausted. At the point of the recording for this, I am very pregnant. I'm almost nine months pregnant and still waddling all over New York City. So by the time you hear this, I should have a baby boy in my arms. I'm praying. I hope I love him. I hope he loves me. I cannot wait. But as I reflect today, I'm thinking about the black women who have inspired me on Broadway, on the stage, and beyond. And you know, last night, not last night, a few nights ago, I saw my friend Husso Simone, her cabaret, her solo debut cabaret in New York City, and it was so magical. It was one of the best ones I've ever seen. It was so incredible. And, you know, she's done a lot of different shows, one of those being Sufs. Sufs was one of my favorite shows when it came out on Broadway. And I did see it on election night, and it was wild. If you have seen the show, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Um, but it was so incredible, and that was not the first time that I'd seen the show. So when I went to go see her cabaret, a lot of her cast members were there. Anastasia McCleskey, Salala, Nikki M. James, others and others. It was so incredible to be surrounded by like these people who I'm like, oh my gosh, you guys are so incredible. Well, after the show, I was trying to get my confidence up to talk to Nikki. And guess what? She came up to me. I'm like, oh my gosh, I've been listening to your voice on a cast album for over a dec like well over a decade. I didn't tell her that, but I just am so inspired by her. And, you know, she told me something that kind of changed how I have been viewing childbirth. I've not done it yet, but I've been very afraid. And she but she showed me that after she gave birth to her daughter, she was in rehearsals for subs, holding her baby girl in her arms during rehearsals at five weeks pregnant. And she showed me these photos, and I I just I don't think I've ever seen that. And if I did, I didn't clock it the way I'm clocking it now. I'm like, wait, what? And she's her and Anastasia, they they really spoke a lot of life into me after Husso's show in a way that I just wasn't expecting. And I just want to pay homage and like to the black women who have come before me, whose shoulders I am standing on, while they're still doing their thing, by the way. Like they are still very much doing their thing. But that doesn't mean they're not like trailblazing and and and still inspiring a whole generation while they're still doing the thing. So I just want to like give them a shout out and so much love. And I want to also talk about like seeing. I know it feels so cliche these days. You hear it all the time. Why does representation matter? Why does it matter? It matters because when you see somebody doing something who looks like you, expands your mind into what is possible for you, for your life. I never realized I could run for president realistically until I saw Hillary do it. Whether it doesn't matter what your political, I'm just saying, like, I'd not seen a woman run in in my lifetime. I, you know, I'd not seen a black person, and then they won. Like, it's like, oh my gosh. And then on the Broadway stage, when you see, like, Audrey McDonald is famous for taking on roles that were written for people who did not look like her. And in doing that, it really does open up a gate and a door and a portal, even. Like, this is one way to do this. You know, it's so easy for me to like look at a role and be like, well, I can't do that. That's written for a white girl. No, that's that's not true. And so I wrote down these three names: Crystal Joy Brown, Audrey McDonald, Aisha Jackson. Aisha Jackson has done this quite a bit in her Broadway career up to date. What, last like she was doing Snow White as Snow Black, really, in Once Upon a One More Time, which I was her alternate for. I started as the swing, swinging 12 roles, but then turned into the principal alternate, covering her and a few others. She's currently, at the time of this recording, playing Daisy in the Great Gatsby on Broadway. Daisy's like, she's the first full-time black Daisy on Broadway. That's a big deal. In Frozen, she was black Anna. Like the movie That was a White Girl. What else did she do that was like, oh my I think there's a couple more that I'm not even remembering off the top of my head. But she has a way of just saying yes and making it her own. And I I wanted to be her understudy for the Britney Spears musical because I knew she has a way of like going about originating a role, and I wanted a front row seat to watch that. And I'm and I got the opportunity to do that, and it was very empowering and inspiring. That me that means a lot to me. That is inspiring. And to watch somebody doing it up close, it's like, okay, so this is possible. And here is the process of doing that. We just talked about Audra a little bit, of how she's historically taken roles. She recent the most recent show, Gypsy, is like she tore that role up, and everyone has their own opinions or whatever. But I saw it in previews, and I it was incredible. I thought she was incredible in Gypsy. And then Crystal Joy Brown, there's a few reasons why I love her. The reason why I'm why I first fell in love with her is a little bit different of a subject than what we're talking about, but she's one of the first like stars that I got to really see shine on Broadway. And by that I mean when I first came to the city and I saw Motown on Broadway, she was the Diana Ross. And it was just effortless for her. And of course, Diana Ross is black, but she and so is Crystal. But she was just so effervescent and so effortless and just so sparkly. And I just fell in love with her. And she has been on Black Hair and Big Links, by the way. So definitely look up her episode on the show. It's on it's in there. So she was inspiring. But I think the latest thing that I saw Crystal Joy Brown in was Merrill We Roll Along. And I have a question mark in my voice because I think the role that she did wasn't originally played by by a black woman, but what she did with the role was just so memorable and so her and so like that's how it made me feel. Just like a sigh. What is that thing for you that you're like, maybe it doesn't have to do with race? Maybe it's about gender, maybe it's about something else where you're like, I don't know if that's for me because of XYZ, or I don't have the education for that, or I don't check these boxes. Forget that. You know, y'all know I'm married to Andrew, and Andrew is the whitest boy ever, okay? And something that I have learned by being married to a very, very white man is to just stop second-guessing yourself and to go for it. Andrew doesn't even think about it. He just takes up space without even trying. He takes up space and he just goes for things and he's just like going for it. He even if he has no idea what he's doing, he just goes for it. And there is something to be said about having like a blind confidence to something. Whereas me, I'm like, I could be the right person for a job, and I'm like, yeah, but I don't have this one little requirement, or like I'm looking for reasons to take myself out of the running. And Andrew's the opposite. He sees like a teeny tiny like crack in the door, and he will burst through it unabashedly, unapologetically, and just go for it. That is wild. That is a completely different place for a mind, like a mindset to be in. But though this society, the this world favors the bold. And I think we credited it a lot to, oh, you know, it's a white man's world or whatever. But I think there is a world in which we can transcend race and we can transcend gender. And if we just believe in ourselves, no matter the context, but really just have the confidence to go for what we freaking want and stop giving ourselves excuses to count ourselves out, to take ourselves out of the running or the or the game and instead just go for it. I think we can accomplish way more than we could ever set out to know or dream that we could do. I really think it's possible and and and to just sounds so corny, but to just believe. Why is it so easy for me to believe in my friends or somebody else around me? But for me, it's like, well, I can't do that. Why the freak not? Why not be? And if you're listening or watching this, why not you? Like, let's stop taking ourselves out of the running and just freaking go for it. We got one life. I'm thinking Eminem. Doot doot doot doot doot doot. We only got one. What is the what am what am I doing? Eight miles, something like that? Do not miss your chance to blow this opportunity comes once in a lifetime where I'm thinking Hamilton, I'm not throwing away my shot. I am not throwing away my shot. Like, let's freaking go for it and stop it with the excuses. Who is with me? See you next week.